Most of us would stop working if we could. We always crave for it, but that’s about as far as we get-dreaming. Working an 8-5 shift just seems inescapable. I, Bochok Tabo, however am a master at defying the inevitable. I stare ‘The Inescapable’ right in the face and call him dirty names. I say, if you want to stop working, QUIT WORKING; The following are the five reasons why you should.
1. If you stop working you’ll have plenty of time to reading articles such as this. That will make me a trademark name down at the Unemployment and Welfare offices. My fame is a simple price in achieving your dreams. You’ll think of this when you see me on TV shows today.
2. There’s a great feeling in quitting your job. You’ll be in cloud nine in 10 minutes, you’ll on the top of the world, you’ll be living the good life, you’ll be: -insert your own line of though here-. Then you’ll start worrying about the car note, the mortgage, the kid’s school clothes, groceries, and and how you’re going to pay the amount you owe to other companies. All this will probably depress you to the point of assisted suicide, but at least you had 10 minutes of freedom.
3. Daytime TV shows is some of the most breathtaking and captivating television in the market. You’ll think how you ever survived without all those quality soap operas, daytime talk shows, and judge shows where you get the sinking suspicion that the judge has been paid off. When you combine this with all the informative commercials that are shown during day time that will ”Get a degree from home’, ‘Make $1,000 a day answering emails’,'Learn the Internet in 2 hours’ in such exciting fields as GED preparation and septic tank scrubber’ and you’ll not only wonder why you didn’t quit your job sooner, you’ll also vow to never work again.
4. In your formerly employed state you missed all those calls from colletors and billing agents. Now that you have quit your job you’ll be able to sit at home in eager anticipation of these oh-so-important calls. Toss in a few telemarketers, calls from various associations begging for donations, and a few of those computers that call you and ask you to ‘Hold for an important message’ and you’ll have a full day of just answering the phone. It’s like having a job again, without all the hassle of getting a paycheck.
5. Drawing yourself out of bed every morning at 5:45 in the morning can’t be good for your health. Your doctor will be happy to know for caring enough about your body’s well-being to go as far as resigning from your job. He won’t see you anymore, however, because you no longer have health insurance. But there’s no need to worry, after all that’s why we have free clinics. Waiting in this clinic young teenagers diagnosed with Gonorrhea is is another wonderful experience you will surely miss if you had kept your day job.
There you have it folks. 5 reasons why you should immediately go out and resign from your job. Have a free feeling to say these to your boss when you turn in your two weeks notice. If she asks where you came across such valuable information say to her that unselfish friend provided them to you, and all I asked in return was that you think of me when you get your septic tank scrubbed next time…
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